Review: The series might be full of reliable multiplayer racers that never seem to push the envelope, but is MARIO KART 7 a lazy, gimmicky also-ran? Read on to find out.
Think about that name for a second. Mario Kart 7. It’s brave, ditching the obvious, ubiquitous 3D-related moniker Nintendo could have used. It’s bold, a completely new and gimmick-free approach to titling. It’s also a statement of arrogance, rubbing the series’ six previous iterations into everyone’s face. And why wouldn’t they? The last one, Mario Kart Wii, is creeping towards an insane 30 million sales.
It’s a consistent series. There’s always been an underlying level of unmistakeable Nintendo polish and quality, but the games themselves have been unmistakably familiar and reliant on gimmicks, falling back on ‘classic’ tracks but rarely touching the core gameplay. The developers almost can’t try something different and experiment, for fear of upsetting fans, and why would they?
Hell is a Blue Shell
MK7′s primary additions come in the form of flying and underwater sections, arguably adding a little depth to the racing to go along with the 3DS’ slider. These limited sections spice up the brand new circuits for a few moments, plunging racers to the seabed or launching them into the air to hang-glide for a while. Throughout, the game looks stunning with bright, bold colours and probably the finest 3D this side of Super Mario 3D Land to go along with the silky smooth frame rate, whether you’re playing in 3D or not.
The 32 tracks are split up into eight different four-track cups, four for New and four for Classics. It’s an odd decision to split up old and new in such a binary way, as the elder circuits might be remastered but take no advantage of the fresher features. Not that the underwater and aerial sections add a great deal: being underwater loosens your control and slows down your descents, while the gliding sequences are far too brief to change the racing in a significant way, beyond allowing you to dive and pull up for a little boost.
For the most part, all the tracks are relatively solid, with a few standouts like Waluigi’s pinball course and the limited number of point-to-point rather than circuit races. There’s a perfunctory feel that permeates many of the tracks though, especially the new ones, leaving many feeling a bit by-the-numbers and lazily predictable in their item, boost and jump placement. Coins make a return in races, allowing you to hold up to 10 simultaneously while a constant tally of how many you’ve picked up is kept and at points unlocks new vehicle customisation parts, each of which have different looks and plusses and minuses to weight, speed and handling.
Even though MK7 has the most customization options of any entry in the series, ultimately such differentiation counts for naught in the races themselves. The racing is as unbalanced and almost ridiculously field-levelling power-ups. Having a ‘strong race’ in Mario Kart is always about somehow managing the mid-field before sprinting in the last lap, desperate to avoid the still bloody awful Blue Shell and the constant trail of attacks that leading racers come under in the latter stages of a race. It’s still unfair in a way that could have you hurling your handheld in rage after the tenth consecutive 1st to 8th drop in the last corner of the final lap of an otherwise perfect Cup.
It’s in this skewed, awful catch-up that Mario Kart’s continual failure to be an appealing singleplayer game remain as self-evident as ever. Racing in 50cc is way too easy, 100cc only a tiny bit more daunting, but in 150cc playing solely against the AI feels broken and downright unfair rather than challenging. The new weapons don’t exactly add much to the experience either: Super Leaf which gives you a Tanooki tail is only useful in the rare chance you’re bunched up with others, the fire flower lets you spit a few fireballs and the Lucky 7 is rare as it gives you, surprisingly, seven power-ups to launch and cause chaos.
Spinning its wheels
Along with the basic races, you can also do Coin and Balloon battles but against AI both are about as fun as munching on glass, and there’s also Time Trials for beating staff, friends and StreetPass ghost times. If you miss MK Wii’s motion controls and actively hate yourself there’s an option for first-person driving, turning the 3DS into a steering wheel and completely breaking the gorgeous 3D effects. It doesn’t feel right though: seeing the blue and hopefully red sparks on the back of your kart and not turning the whole damn console around corners is the better way to play.
Alone, as ever Mario Kart 7 is not a great deal of fun, but for what it’s worth those with 3DS-owning friends will be able to get enjoyment out of a single copy. Download play allows access to all tracks but limits non-owners to racing as Shy Guy with a basic kart, and you can have up to seven friends all playing in close proximity from one copy after you go through a quite lengthy download process.
This is absolutely the best way to play every Mario Kart game: the ability to mock and have a laugh about screwing over other players never fails to make sense of how screwed up and unenjoyable playing on your lonesome is: because they make playing against friends so much fun.
MK7 also features some surprisingly rugged and extensive online multiplayer features. Although totally lacking the same sense of social humour that comes from local play, being teamed up with people from all over the globe works surprisingly smoothly for amicable but often exciting races, with surprisingly little lag. There’s some clever social functions too, allowing you to jump into multiplayer with friends easily or even join groups to expand your reach. It’s almost non-clunky enough to seem like Nintendo are finally admitting that online gaming is “a thing” that they should be providing in their games.
Mario Kart 7 ticks all the boxes it needs to. It’s a quality kart racer with friends, it’s got a handful of new tracks and an equal dose of classics too, but none are terrible – even the Rainbow Road here isn’t a horrible nightmare, but playing the game at all on your own still is. It’s got a few neat new twists on the formula but it’s also got some pointless extra gimmicks, none of which really add or change anything of substance. It’s fun and accessible but unashamedly familiar, and highlights exactly why the series can only get away with one iteration per Nintendo console: its lack of adventure, imagination and the slightest hint of innovation is keeping the series stale.
More of the same for better and worse, Mario Kart 7 does little to raise itself above its predecessors, adding nothing more than pointless gimmicks and failing to enhance the terrible singleplayer.
Mario Kart 7, by Nintendo EAD/Retro Studios, is out now for 3DS.
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